Grumpiness and Disappointment

So there is a lot of noise outside your door and you wake up several times because of it. I am grumpy today not at any body thats an adult but my younger brothers. They decided to go to bed at 7:30 am and then I had to get up at 8:00 I am grumpy as I said. I mean I am very disappointed that the don't have the dignity to think of others but themselves and I am tired of it. I said I was disappointed and thats all I have to say is disappointment. I have come to the conclusion it hurts more when someone says they are disappointed in you. I mean I shut down or break down is more like it. I mean it means a lot I guess the human need is to be accepted and trusted by fellow humans. When we are called a disappointment we get crushed not physically but mentally. Every person knows how is like when the are told that someone is disappointed in them. I mean more and more things happen as we go on in life. Trust is key if you don't trust someone how can you feel comfortable. Or lets say your brother sneaks out and doesn't come home until three. Well you don't trust them to leave the house. Or say they smoke with friends under age you don't trust them to be around friends. Honestly it is not that hard and it's easy to stay out of trouble yeah you can be a daredevil at some points but not stupid stunts when your not an adult. I know this blog may seem I am venting, I am and I am done now. Godspell is going really well..... Any who be yourself and don't try to impress someone by not being who you are.

Opening night for Godspell!

Godspell opens tonight Under the direction of Annie Fields and Music directed by Anne Puzey. The show is going to be a great show it is $5.00 for a ticket you can't beat that for a good show. 7:00pm is when it starts and it is at Calvary Chapel, 460 W Century Dr. (4350 S). I can personally say I enjoy the show. Playing Jesus has been a journey and I can say I have grown. So many good things are going to happen with this show and you will not wanna miss it. for the next two weekends there will be shows playing and thats where you can find me. We have a great cast and crew it put a lot of effort towards the show but it is well paid off. So many things will be great and just more and more growing from the cast as well. We have had our ups and downs but what cast doesn't. I will hopefully want to see people come to the show for it's awesome message! Godspell you can't miss it. I just herd that Godspell will open on Broadway finally in October. Sure it has been in New York but it has only been on off broadway productions. Come see Godspell you won't want to miss it. Come with and open heart and have fun. I am excited to perform it I hope you will enjoy the show.  

Fun Love!

Amanda Andersen, what can I say about her. She is amazing I can never ever thank her for everything she has done for me. I love her. plain and simple. Even though sometimes I can be difficult she is amazing. I was told opposites attract and my teacher in my sociology class was right and it is amazing. So many people say that she is too short for me. I don't care I love her I think she is the right height for me, perfect, I can rest my head on her head when I am tired and don't want to stand. She accepts me for who I am and i can never thank her enough. Lately I have not been able to see her as much and it pains me because I love being around her. Work is killing me I had one of the worst nightmares I was in character still and it was one of the most scary dreams. I called her and she was there at 2 o clock in the morning. Calming me down and just saying everything is okay. This girl makes me really happy. I love her again plain and simple I can't explain it. I feel warm and comfortable around her and I  trust her with my life. Her whole family is amazing too. I love them. I have never had another family care so much and make me feel welcome. Love is something you can explain. We need to love and to be loved to survive call me a hippy but the show I am currently doing is so 70's era that I am starting to turn into a hippy.

Godspell is coming along great. The show is emotionally draining and I have never understood why shows drain oh maybe it was a college professor that taught me the right way to act instead of fake and acting and singing pretty. Jesus Christ is the most difficult role to play as we all know he was perfect. I, myself, am not perfect. I wish I could be just like him. I have had religion put upon me through my whole life and I have had no one let the subject become my own. They say they want to share their happiness and joy with me. It's not really joyous when people chastise you for not going to church or saying what you believe is wrong. I was raised hard core Lutheran and then had various religions come up and say what you believe is wrong and then have me come to there church and not accept me for believe their beliefs. I know what is true. Jesus Christ cam to this earth he suffered for our sins and was a complete perfect man. He was risen from the dead three days later and people still believe the Law is the most important. I say yes and no to that stament. Obey the law which Christ has commanded but do not obey the law thinking if you try to do these to earn a spot in heaven you surly will not. Christ has tol us what to do in his word. "You shall do homage to the Lord your God and worship him alone." Jesus Christ is an amazing man and an inspiration. I am trying not o get on my soap box and be preachy but he is amazing. I could never be like him. I sure can try but all will fall short to the glory God. Godspell has reminded me of the important lessons I need to be reminded of. I am excited for the show to open!

Frustrations/Family

Out of my entire life I have never understood the fact of frustrations. Frustrations hurt so badly. Frustrations in Family hurt too. I come from a family of ten we added a new addition to the family Britney Shackelford. God Bless her it she is such a sweet heart and I am very glad she is her I love venting to her she listens with a good and patient heart. Family should be understanding. Today mine really wasn't they are not trying to let people in and they love to assume and they say the right thing at the exact wrong time. key word WRONG time. Then the insults come out and frustrations and the F bombs fly and everything goes to high hell. I was trying to help with a project and i was feeling angst but when someone sits and accuses or talks or insults another family member behind their back or when they are not there it is something I cannot tollerate. I love my family don't get me wrong I am just frustrated. What was said should have not been said and I was like oh my word can you just brush it off your shoulder but people take things so personally. I take it personally too and I am sick of it. I myself am trying to figure out how to be patient and not take things so personally. If my family is reading this I want them to know I love them very much I could never ask for a better family.